I have a Phobia! (Hydrokourophobia)

2:48 PM

Hello, readers!

Have you ever been afraid of something too much? Because now I wanna talk about my phobia.

I'm a psychology student, so I know I have to be sure enough to say that I actually have a phobia. I never really though about this before, but I have one episode in my life that I was in a complete terror because of this phobia.

I have Hydrokourophobia.

It's a phobia of deep and dark water, like the sea at night, or a blue hole. I never really able to explain the situation to anyone until I found this on Google. It perfectly describes my fear of the thing:

I was also helpless knowing what kind of phobia do I have, but I'm pretty sure now. Anyway, beside those situations described above, I also have some hard times watching or playing video games that are happen to be in the deep dark water scenes. Somehow it gives me terror when I watch one of PewDiePie video reaction with Oculus Rift when the scene was underwater, or anything involving deep dark water. Last night, I tried to watch In The Heart of The Sea (streaming, thanksfully) and I already got a heart attack watching the first 5 minutes of the movie. I ended up slammed my laptop even before any characters showed up. Also, the first time I tried to do a research about my phobia on Google, I opened a website that can make us sure whether we have the phobia or not, buy showing an extra large picture of "scary pictures" and I also ended up flipping my laptop.

About my terror experience, I really didn't expect such a terror that time. I was going to a theme park, called Dufan, near the sea with my friends (about 6 or 7 years ago). After the sun was down, we chose to had dinner at a fast food restaurant that was literally next to the sea. It was around 6 or 7 p.m., so it was already dark. Before we went to the restaurant, one of my friend wanted to take picture with the night sea. We weren't on the beach though, it was like there was this sea after the wall.

For the whole day I was fine. Until my friends went nearer to the sea. I walked normally until I saw clearer scenery of the dark sea that's happen to be deep *of course*. For the first time in my life, I froze. I literally couldn't move my feet any closer. I was such in fear. As I like to say, I was in a complete terror. I didn't know what happen to me. I was a few meters from the sea, and my body couldn't move more than that specific distance. All of my friends took pictures of themselves near the sea, and I decided not to. I didn't tell my friends that I was in such fear, I just tried to handle it myself. I was confused, yet I tried not to think too much about that. And so I passed the terror experience as we left the place and went to the restaurant.

But since then, I always think about that. Whenever I accidentally saw some inappropriate pictures or videos (inappropriate: involving my fear), I always think about how come I can have such fear. And I have 2 theories though:

1. I can't swim
Yes, I can't swim. And I thought maybe one of the reasons I'm afraid of "that" is because I can't swim, so I'm afraid if I happen to fall into the deep dark water, I might end up dead of drowning. And everyone can't help/find me because I fall too deep into the water. Oh boy...

2. I have a scary experience about deep dark water
I'm not sure I have an experience about deep dark water, but I remember that I had an experience of having fear involving water. It was when I was still a kindergarten student. My family and I went on a vacation to Anyer, one of the famous beach in the West Java. Then we went on a boat to crossed the sea into a water cave. I remember I was such a brave kid on the boat, didn't want to wear the safety vest. But after we reached the cave, it was a bit different. The cave was full of waterfalls, and the olders were swimming in the cave. I didn't remember a lot, but all I could remember was we were on top of this small yet hard waterfall to the sea, and my Mom wanted to take picture of us two. I was such in a terror. I remember I was afraid that my Mom would fall to the sea. I didn't know how I could have such thought. As always, I didn't tell that anybody that I was in fear. But we still can tell that I was in a bad fear by looking at the picture that we actually took. In the picture, I didn't even look at the camera. The fear really showed up in my face and my eyes were all looking to the waterfall that literally next to me.

At least that's some logical explanations that I tried to explain to myself. I once doing a free falling (you know, jump from the top of a waterfall to the water below) in a waterfall, and I didn't have such fear. Maybe because it was at noon, or because I was wearing a safety vest (so I couldn't drown to death). And for now, I always wanted to learn how to swim. I think maybe it can lessen my fear of the "thing".

I have never found myself in such near dark sea again since then. I don't know whether I want to try to make sure about my phobia or not.

I just want to write my phobia down, I wanna know are there anyone near me that have the same or even weirder fear. Share with me what are you afraid of! Or more specifically, what is your phobia? Is it really bugging your daily activities?

And that's it!
Thank's for reading, readers!

P.S. I'm really sorry I can't put some specific pictures that describe my phobia. Just google "hydrokourophobia" or "blue hole", you'll find a lot of it. I'd like to help you give better image, but something in my head held me not to open it :(

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  1. For me, it is trypophobia. Gosh. I nearly fainted because that-stupid-account-on-facebook share some pictures for the sake of likes��������

    1. I know right! We need to clean social medias from that kind of account! What a shame...

  2. kalo aku phobia nya takut kucing. gatau kenapa padahal gapernah dicakar sama kucing, tapi ya takut aja


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